Trust me, I get it. A few years ago, I wouldn’t have believed it either. Not too long ago, it would have been very difficult to convince me that women support women, particularly black women. Heck, the main reason for me starting Women By Choice was due to the lack of support that I experienced as a woman and a female entrepreneur. These days, I am excited and proud to say that my perspective has changed. I don’t know if it’s because I have intentionally attracted and surrounded myself with positive and supportive women or if women are finally getting the message that we are not each other’s enemies, or both, but either way I am glad that my world is now full of women who are supportive of me and one another.
The last 2 weekends of my life have been nothing short of magical, aside from picking up a nasty cold during the last weekend, which was clearly meant to force me to slow down and get some rest, but even that couldn’t dull down my excitement for the wealth of love, positive energy, and support that I recently experienced. To start, my book signing in Orlando, FL was amazing! I prayed that this event be fun and that only cool and positive women show up and that’s exactly what happened. Bright colors, brown skin, smiling faces, and lots of laughter are what I most remember. I literally had to take a step back to thank God for allowing my journey to lead me to be in a room with such amazingly beautiful, intelligent, talented, and successful women, women who thought enough of me to pay their hard earned money to celebrate my accomplishment. As if that wasn’t enough, there were unexpected surprises and much more support than I expected. I felt butterflies in my stomach when my WBC sis, Kima from Sweet Scapes Catering, came walking up to the restaurant with a big box in hand. Once she revealed what was inside, I was almost moved to tears to see what she took the time to make me. If I wasn’t trying to save my make-up, I would have for sure started crying a river. It was by far one of the most thoughtful and sweetest things anyone has done for me. Then, my WBC sis, Natasha B. showed up with like 10 awesome giveaways for my guests from Fashion Fab Boutique. And if that wasn’t enough, my always supportive and business savvy sis, Altrichia Cook, showed up with 2 cases of wine sponsored by Moskato Life to continue the celebration with. I was also gifted a really nice dress from Miranda, co-owner of Graffiti Garb, which was totally thoughtful and completely unexpected. The entire event was truly a breath-taking, humbling, and magical moment in my life and it is one that I will never forget. I’m so thankful for my WBC sis, Channell, who pushed me to host this event and helped me every step of the way to ensure that it was successful. I’m telling you, “When Women Support Women, We ALL Win!”
Last weekend, I felt like the enemy was trying to take me out with what I call “the cold from hell”, but there was no stopping me from getting to Chicago to celebrate with 300 Black Women. That’s right, over 300 black women came together in The Grand Ballroom at the Hilton Hotel in Oak Lawn, IL for an afternoon of sisterhood. This again was a breath-taking moment to remember. To have been invited by the host, Dr. Tammy, for a book signing of my new book, She Wins: The Ultimate Guide for Women to Gain a Winning Mindset and Lead a Winning Lifestyle was an honor enough. I was simply happy and proud to be recognized for my work by women in a city that I had never visited and have the opportunity to fellowship with new sisters. However, when Dr. Tammy told me that she had a seat for me on the stage as one of the honorees, I was in complete awe. Truthfully, she had already laid the red carpet out from me from the time I landed in Chicago so I already felt special and welcomed. I again had to take a step back and thank God for leading me to this moment in my life. Here I was, a woman from Orlando, FL, being honored among women of Chicago because my book has been positively impacting women worldwide. Sitting on that stage and looking around at the over 300 beautiful brown-skinned women in all white was a miraculous sight to see. I don’t think I’ve ever seen so many melanated Queens together in one setting. The energy from beginning to end was positive as Dr. Tammy set the tone for us to all be in the spirit of love and the mindset of sisterhood. Unlike how the media tries to portray us, there were no fights, pulling hair, or rolling eyes. All of the women showed up with smiling faces and good vibes. I was honored and proud just to be among them. When it came time for me to perform my book signing, the women of Chicago showed major love. As my publisher, Ardre Orie (13th & Joan) stood by taking pictures like a proud mom, women gathered around my table to get their signed copies. Some women bought 3-4 books and some even refused their change just to show support for me being there. When all was said and done, Chicago didn’t owe me anything.
I share this because despite what some people want us to believe, women, specifically black women, do support each other. If that is not your perspective or experience then I say that you need to change both your attitude and surroundings. It wasn’t until I stopped complaining about women not supporting each other and being skeptical about the possibility of us being capable of supporting one another that I began to manifest a reality where all of the women in my circle are genuine, loving, and supportive. I found that by being a woman who sees value in other women and supports them without a hidden agenda allows me to attract women who see value in me and support me without underlying intentions. You are what you attract. Until you can become a woman who genuinely supports other women, you will never see the beauty of living a reality where women genuinely support women. I went from completely avoiding women to being excited to be around them. Women DO support women!