By my 3rd round of Chemo my hair had started to shed. And though I’ve worn a low cut for the past few years I knew going bald was going to be extreme for me.
By session 5 my hair was completely gone, no lashes,no eye brows and I was devastated to say the least. I’ve worn a scarf and hat everyday & everywhere For 5 months and now that Chemo season is over I assumed my hair would grow back quickly mainly because that’s what I wanted it to do. Almost a month after chemo and still my hair hadn’t grown the way I’d hoped.
As the weather changed with the rise in temperature I was starting to feel imprisoned with my head covered all the time. At night, if I was out alone I would gift myself the freedom of allowing my head to breathe. I felt so free although in the back of my mind I was hoping not to run into someone I knew.
2 months later, I decided I had enough. I just couldn’t cover my head anymore or worry about what people at work, Church or any where else would think or what questions they would have. I realized it was unhealthy for me to make my healing process about anyone else other than me. One morning,I sat at my desk, hot & uncomfortable so, I just uncovered my head and left it that way ever since.
When you are dealing with physical changes against your will and beyond your control it is extremely difficult. Out of love I’ve had friends suggest I get a wig add some lashes and draw in my brows but honestly that would have taken me further away from my comfort zone. Also, I had no desire to find a new way to cover my head or camouflage the season of life I’m in.
June 2nd made 3 months since I completed chemo. My hair continues to sprout and my lashes & eyebrows have almost fully returned. This process has taught me patience and I have developed a level of self confidence I never had.
I have grown to accept and appreciate what’s happening regarding my recovery process no matter how slow or indiscreet.