She sat across from him in the car with her face scrunched up. They were having this same damn conversation again, any other time, she would’ve been devastated, this time she was annoyed. She stared at him and could feel her face flushing from anger as he tried, once again, to rationalize his decision. She rolled her eyes, and looked out of the car window at her house. There was nothing else she could do for him or with him, she wanted a relationship with him, and he wasn’t ready. Tired of listening to his excuses, she put her hand up and said “sooooo, you want to take, another damn break?”. She reached up and turned the car light on, this time, she was going to look him in his eyes and make him say it. He stared at her, at a loss for words, and she grew impatient. “Just say it! You don’t want this, a relationship, you want to have sex with a bunch of girls and do your own thing”. She waited for his response and after all of the explaining he did earlier, he had the nerve to not have a response at the moment. “You only want a break, so you can go do your thing, and come back to me when you’re done! It’s all good though, I let you think that was ok, but not anymore”. She pulled her scarf around her neck and unlocked the car door. Go on and do you, I’m out, for good”. She opened the door and walked to her house, not even bothering to look back literally or figuratively. There was no point…
True story!! I once dated a guy that took more breaks than a freakin Kit Kat bar commercial! Every time he needed a break, I cried my eyes out and waited for him to call me again. When he did call me, I was more than happy to let him back in. Reminiscing on this, I shudder at the low self-esteem that I had. Here’s the thing also, I was a baddie! Tight body, absolutely gorgeous head to toe, just gorgeous (I still am, but this tie my insides match). So, I could’ve had anybody I wanted, however, when a beautiful woman’s self-esteem is low, she will settle for any bullshit that cones her way.
There are way too many beautiful women that are settling. Settling in life, love and their careers. This goes back to my post earlier this week about self-love being the foundation. There are many things I have learned as I have gone through my own process of glowing up, and one of them is this. When a man wants you sweetheart, it will be very clear, and nothing will stand in his way. Even if that man wants you, you have to remember this, you teach people how to treat you. Also, I say it all of the time, just because someone loves you, doesn’t mean you stop loving yourself.
Please know your self worth enough to know that you don’t have to settle for someone who doesn’t see how absolutely dope you are. You never, ever, lose, by making the decision to move on and continue growing until someone comes along that does know your worth and is ready to give you the love you deserve. I’m the happiest that I have been ever! At this point in my life I am an unstoppable force, and I will not settle for anything less than what I deserve. I want you to feel the same way about yourself sis!
That guy that I described in the scene above? Guess where he is now? in my inbox, where he will stay.
Remember this Queen, it is not a man’s job to give you your crown, he only needs to recognize it.